I hate you coughing at night: please get better. You & your sister are welcome to sleep with Mummy & Daddy any time you like if it makes you feel better.
Love, Daddy (& Mummy)
Dear ‘family who stayed with us this week’:
Thank you for your company, & for your help with the babies, & for your cooking & cleaning. But especially for the cupcakes.
Love, grateful me
Dear Birmingham Council
Well done for finally collecting our rubbish. Although I do like to think it was because I yelled at you & threatened all sorts of legal action.
Now: the recycling?
Slightly less smelly me
Dear neighbours’ contractors
Well done for finally filling in the ditch you dug in my front garden. Although I think it was because I yelled at you &… well, you get the idea.
And you were so smegging polite I couldn’t even be mad at you
Still waiting for a date for my Op. Looks like my yelling at you wasn’t enough. Playing hardball eh? Well I feel a strongly worded letter coming on! So there!
Still sore me
Thanks for not kicking me in the bollocks recently
Slightly less sore me
- Dear So & So (whiskeyforaftershave.wordpress.com)
- A tale of two bin collections: The street where one council takes away rubbish on one side of the road while the other is left (dailymail.co.uk)