I’ve been listening today to a programme on Radio 4 with Mums of twins talking about their experiences. Maybe it was deliberately editted that way, & the focus of the programme, but I was very surprised at how negative they were. It was all about how tough it was, how hard, depression, trauma. Very little about the joys of having twins, the specialness of enjoying not only how a baby grows up & develops, but how 2 of the same age also discover & interact with each other. How they can be so alike & yet so different. Twins are special; we don’t feel hard done by, we feel incredibly lucky. They’re 2-for-1 babies! Double the trouble, double the fun: more, in fact.
Yes, twins are very hard work, but I wouldn’t swap ours for anything.
Having said that…
Just as I wrote that 1 of them finished by saying almost word-for-word “I wouldn’t swap ours for anything”.
And I understand how tough it can be looking after twins. We’ve been very lucky in that for the crucial, & crucially demanding, first year of their lives both of us have been available nearly 24 hours to care for them. These women didn’t seem to have that, & we’ve often said to each other that we don’t know how either of us could have coped alone.
Our both being available has made an enormous difference. Not just practically, but also in that someone is almost always there to care for them & help them when they need us to. And most importantly, despite their health problems, our babies seem happy.
Our twin babies are greatly loved, & I think they know that.
And that’s the thing – and maybe I wasn’t listening carefully enough & I just missed it, & I’m very sorry if I’ve misjudged these parents who have both clearly been through great hardships – but I don’t recall hearing anyone say that.
After all, isn’t that what it’s all about?